>> 27 Sep 2004

Three Stooges and a Sage



What do Maurice Hayes, James 'Insanity' Kelly and Tom Deignan all have in common? Well, for a start, they belong to that school of journalists who believe the word of government translates into automatic promises on behalf of the IRA. These three idiots all wax lyrical about the envisaged end of the Provisional movement as currently constituted, yet we ordinary mortals have not a word on the subject from the mythical 'P O'Neill'; the only word we are expected to swallow is the word of two governments unparalleled in telling 'porkies' to Ulster's pro-Union majority.



Another thread of commonality revolves around the willingness of these individuals to lay the blame for the present impasse at the foot of the DUP. Deignan criticises Paisley's party for apparently seeking 'the hegemony of Unionists over nationalists.' Translated into plain English from pathos-saturated Paddy-speak, Deignan levels vitriol at the representatives of the majority community for wanting the same conditions underpinning democratic procedure as exist elsewhere around the globe. 'Insanity' Kelly has concentrated on a similar theme (must have thought it up whilst shaking wildly and dribbling into his wincarnis), admonishing the DUP for changing the 'name of the game' (just about everyone knew the DUP had a mandate to end nationalist appeasement from last November: everyone, apparently, except Kelly). Hayes, for his part, simply wants Unionism to roll over and be trampled upon by Irish nationalism in the way it has been since 1998.



Compare and contrast the bitter, self-pitying piss artistry from these guys, and the very reasonable and articulate submission forwarded by Bob McCartney for the Belfast Telegraph. McCartney, rightly, states that the original Belfast Agreement has its foundations in IRA appeasement and, consequently, if the basis for appeasement no longer exists in a post 9/11 era, the same agreement needs to be radically changed to tally with a more democratic framework in local Ulster politics. 'Accountability' isn't some cheap phrase designed to restore Unionist majoritarianism (if Unionists want that, I'll consider standing for election there), it is about guaranteeing the fundamental principle of cabinet responsibility to the electorate as a whole. If nationalists will not accept changes to their precious agreement, they will simply bear witness to its eventual demise - with results vastly more unsuited to nationalist aspirations than those of their Unionist counterparts.


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